Catch Me If I Fall
by WishingUnderStars
Summary: America Singer had always thought she had the average life with good friends and a caring family. She never wanted anything more. One day, however, an old somebody comes back to town, and she realizes that maybe there was something missing in her life. Maybe needing is so much more than wanting. Modern AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, this is my 'new' story. It's basically like TTOOL, but it's been modified and hopefully, better. The plot was too confusing in TTOOL, so this is just a trial chapter. If you guys like it, I'll continue. :)**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: all Selection rights belong to the wonderful Kiera Cass**

The first day of school was always dreadful. It meant squishing between people in the crowded hallways and being met with a heap of work after spending time relaxing in the summer.

To avoid the loud commotion, I took to walking around the nearly-deserted second floor, waiting for my best friend, Marlee, to come. There was only one other person in the corridor, and he looked lost. I watched him peer at the classroom doors, seemingly looking for his homeroom.

"You need any help?" I asked, my voice echoing down the hall.

He turned around and looked surprised.

"Um, yeah," he said. I smiled at his confusion and walked over to him. He had blond hair like honey and brown eyes like chocolate; he kind of seemed dreamy. Like summertime.

"Hi, I'm America," I introduced with a little wave.

Perplexed by whatever it was, it took him a moment to say, "Oh, uh, hi. I'm Maxon."

"Nice to meet you. Anyway, you needed help?" I asked again.

"Yeah," he said, handing me his schedule.

"Room 208," I read. "Okay, right this way."

I started walking and he did too, alongside me.

"English," I said.

"What?"

"Oh, I was just saying that you have English first."

He rolled his eyes. "Homeroom English isn't fun," he stated.

I laughed. "You have no idea. Ninth grade I had that, and it was torture. We had seminars and essays to complete in the morning." I looked back down at his schedule. "And AP English? Good luck with that."

He smiled and shook his head. "Thank you. I'll need all the luck I can get."

We walked in silence around a corner and listened to the chatter of people slowly filling the halls. Not knowing what to say, he said, "So, what do you have first?"

I handed his schedule back to him and replied, "Music...vocals, in case you were wondering."

He nodded and there was a quietness between us as he observed his surroundings, taking in the school.

"So, you're new here?" I asked.

His eyes flickered onto mine.

"Yeah, my family actually just moved back here. We arrived a few weeks ago."

I raised my eyebrows.

"Wow," I mumbled. "So you're just coming back for senior year?"

He frowned. "How did you know what grade I'm in?"

"Oh," I said, flustered. "It was in your course code on your schedule."

"Right."

We rounded the corner and I led him into the half-full classroom.

"So, there you are. If you need any help, just call for America Singer in room 117."

A flicker of confusion crossed his face before he laughed nervously. "Thanks, but I think I'll be fine."

With a smile, I said, "Okay. Well, have a great first day."

"Thanks. You too."

He walked away to find a seat, and at the same time, a pair of hands covered my eyes. Its owner sang, "Guess who?"

I pried the hands away from me and turned around.

I threw my arms around Marlee and felt hers wrap around me.

"I've missed you," I said.

"We saw each other yesterday," she remarked.

"Whatever. I still missed you," I countered.

She laughed and gave me a squeeze. "So, who was that hot guy you were with?"

I pulled away from her and ushered her down the hall so Maxon wouldn't accidentally hear what we were saying.

"Marlee Tames, were you spying on me?" I asked.

"Maybe," she said, shying away.

I laughed. "And just for the fact, you are a terrible human being. Would you like me to explain?"

She frowned. "Please do."

"Well, you just called a guy hot, even though you're dating Carter." Carter Woodwork was Marlee's blond hair, blue eyed heartthrob. They've been dating for four months now, and before that, they'd been flirting with each other for who knows how long.

"Just because I'm dating someone doesn't mean I can't think other guys aren't hot. Besides, don't you think he is? Or are you scared of what Aspen will say?" Aspen Leger was _my_ sweetheart until a few weeks ago, when he told me that he wasn't enough for me, that I deserved more than him. He wasn't rich and was forced to cram into a small run-down apartment with his six younger siblings and mother. I remember he said that if there was a future of us together, then it would be a shuddering thought; cold, hungry, waiting for something better. I told him that it didn't matter, that I would love him no matter what.

But, stubborn as he was, he didn't let me have my way and decided to end it. My family hadn't known about my relationship with Aspen, so when I spent days cooped up in my room and crying, I told them it was over something stupid, like a sad movie. I loved him. I still did.

"Aspen and I are kind of over now," I said solemnly, fiddling with the ends of my shirt.

Noticing my change, Marlee put a comforting hand over mine. "I'm sorry. It's just that you guys were so happy together. And for two years."

I gave a weak smile and thought back to the summer, when he would hold my hand as we walked down the Los Angeles beaches. I remember how he would tickle my nose and give me whispers of kisses, saying, 'Mer, I love you'. I could still remember how I would run my fingers through his dark hair that smelled like homemade soap and lose myself in those mysterious green eyes.

It was perfect.

But then I remember how those moments seemed to become less and less frequent as he looked at me in a different kind of way. A more concerned one.

"America?" Marlee asked, taking me away from my thoughts.

I blinked.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Hm? Yeah. I'm fine," I lied. I swallowed hard, trying to keep tears from surfacing. I missed him so much.

"I'm really sorry," Marlee said again.

I looked away from her. "It's okay," I whispered. No. I wasn't going to cry.

I took a deep breath and looked into my best friend's brown eyes again.

"Hey, it's okay," she said. "You'll find someone who won't give up on you."

I rolled my eyes as best as I could. "That's definitely not what I need right now."

She laughed and we kept on walking.

Marlee suddenly stopped in her tracks as she saw something. I followed her gaze and muttered, "Oh no."

"Indeed," I heard her say.

There, standing not so far away was Celeste Newsome, or the girl who hated me. She caught my stare and squinted before stalking over to us. She wore a daunting black shirt and equally dark leggings. Her brown hair was tied high into a ponytail and her lips sported a bold red colour. She was intimidating. Her hips swayed with each step of her confident stride. The day hadn't even started and I was already annoyed with her.

I remember one point in time before high school when Celeste had been friendly and nice, but ever since ninth grade started, she hated me with a passion. I never knew why, but I was always determined to find out.

When she finally came to speaking distance, she greeted us, "Ginger, blondie, how are you two?"

I rolled my eyes. "Fine," I bit out.

"Oh my, what a temper."

"Okay, Celeste. Cut to the chase. What do you want?" I asked.

A grimace played on her features and I could see the boys around us melting.

"Nothing. I just wanted to see if you were all right, especially after what happened with Aspen. But it's okay. He deserved so much better than you anyway," she said with a sneer.

I drew in an infuriated breath and told her, "Yes, actually, I'm feeling better. Thank you for being so concerned. Now if you'll excuse us."

She looked me in the eye and said, "Oh, but gingerhead, I really am concerned for you," in the most feigned voice possible.

I gave her a fake smile and said, "Thank you for your sincerity, but you were never that great of an actress."

With that, I turned my back to her, tugged on Marlee's hand, and walked away.

"That girl makes me sick," Marlee spat out.

"Welcome back to Illea High," I muttered to her.

* * *

I opened the apartment door and walked through with a sigh. School was terrible. I closed the door shut with a bang.

"Kitten?" a voice, my dad's, asked.

"Daddy? Where are you?"

"In the studio."

I slung my backpack onto the living room's couch and trudged to the studio. The room was designed to be an office, but there was no need for one, so we put all of dad's and May's, my younger sister, artwork there.

In the small space, I saw my dad working on a sketch of a girl reading a book. Not looking up from his piece, he said, "Hi, kitten."

"Hi, daddy," I said. I walked over to him and gave him a kiss against his cheek, feeling the stubble tickle my lips.

I grabbed a nearby stool and pulled it over to sit on.

"How was the first day?" he asked.

"Terrifying. Painful. Everything was horrible."

Instead of pressing on the issue, he thankfully said, "Don't worry. It'll get better." He rested his free hand on my knee and patted it.

I smiled. "Thanks, dad."

He continued to draw, and for a few moments, the only sound I could hear was the quiet scratching of the pencil on the paper.

"Where's May?" he asked.

"Oh, she told me she was going to the mall with her friends."

"The mall? Already? It's only the first day."

"Well, being in ninth grade has its advantages. You have less to worry about."

"Why aren't _you_ at the beach or something? You don't have work already, do you?" dad asked.

"It sucks, but yeah, I have work to do. It's not for school, though. I have to practice for the concert on Saturday," I said.

"Saturday?" dad asked with a frown.

"Yeah. Why?"

"I thought it was on Sunday. I made arrangements for us this Saturday night."

"It's all right. The concert's in the afternoon. And what are we doing that night?"

"We're going to have dinner with our old friends. They actually just moved back in town. They have a son your age who goes to your school."

I raised my eyebrows. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. His name's Maxon. Maxon Schreave."

 **Hope you enjoyed!**

 **Please review. Tell me what you liked, didn't like, want to see, don't want to see. Btw, did you see what I made different from my other story?**

 **That's all. Bye and have a good day!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello everyone! New chapter here. (I had the whole day to write because it was a snow day! Score!) This chapter was quite hard to write. I don't know why, though.**

 **Two announcements first.**

 **1\. I don't live in the US, although this story is set there. I'm from Canada, so I'll be basing a lot of the stuff from here (like the school system + terms), not from the US.**

 **2\. I'll most likely be replying to member reviews (after this chapter) using PM.**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: all Selection rights belong to Kiera Cass (go her!) :)**

"Mind if I sit here?"

I turned away from Marlee and Carter and saw Maxon eyeing the cafeteria seat next to me.

"No, not at all," I said, taking my bag off the chair and putting it on the ground.

He smiled.

"We didn't see you yesterday. Or the day before yesterday," I commented as he sat down.

Maxon had eaten lunch with us the first day, but for the next two days, he didn't make an appearance. I had naturally assumed that he found some other friends or skipped. Not like Marlee, Carter, or I had any classes with him.

He shrugged. "I was just in guidance getting some forms and stuff sorted. You know how it is with a new school."

"Hmm...speaking of that, where did you come from before?" I asked.

"Wisconsin."

I saw Marlee divert her attention to us. "Ooh, Wisconsin? I bet there was snow there," she budded in intriguingly. Ever since I met her twelve years ago, Marlee had always wanted to live up north, but with her beach blonde hair and sun kissed skin, it looked like summer had personally invited her to stay in California.

"Yeah, there was. But it was mostly in the winter. I only lived there for one year, so I can't tell you much," he said.

"One year? So does that mean you move a lot?" I asked.

"If you compare me to most people, sure, I move quite a lot. I've lived in Pennsylvania, Texas, Colorado, and New York. It's because of my father's work. He does something for the government, but he's never told me what it's about."

"Huh," Carter said. "Are you staying here then? In Los Angeles?"

"Well, I'm going to be here until the end of the school year. And then I'll probably move away for university by myself. I think my parents are going to stay for the next few years, though. I don't know, that's what they told me," he said.

An idea struck Marlee and she suggested, "Hey, considering that it's senior year and you're going to be stuck with us for the next few months, we'll try to make it as interesting for you as possible. So do you want to go to the beach with us after school?"

I widened my eyes and felt my heartbeat stop for a moment. I looked at her and Carter pleadingly, hoping that they would tell them they had a change of plans. The four of us - Marlee, Carter, Aspen, and I - used to go on sporadic trips to the beach just for the fun of it. I knew Marlee wanted me to move on from Aspen and make him jealous by finding a new guy, but _I_ didn't want to. I wasn't over him yet. Only time would heal the heartbreak; not a boy. I didn't want anyone or anything to replace him, so adding Maxon in the equation would unsettle me.

"Oh, uh, I actually had things to do after school," Carter covered for me. "Don't you remember, Mar? You said you'd come with me."

Realizing her mistake, Marlee said, "Oh, yeah...the thing. I totally forgot."

I gave a quiet smile and thanked them silently.

Maxon looked at all of us suspiciously. Noting that I needed to explain the situation privately, Carter told Marlee, "I've got something in my locker I want to show you."

Without another word, they gathered up their belongings and walked away.

When they were out of sight, Maxon asked, "What was that all about?"

"Nothing."

I looked down and mumbled, "It's just that we used to go to the beach with my ex." A hollowness filled my stomach at the last word. Aspen wasn't supposed to be history, he was supposed to be my present and my future.

"Oh. I'm sorry," he said.

There was a silence as I tried to figure out where I stood in Aspen's life. Although he broke up with me, I would sometimes see him in the halls looking longingly at me. Our gazes would hold on each other and the world would stop spinning, but after that split second, he would avert his attention from me and mine him.

"I'm guessing you're not over him yet," Maxon said.

"No, I'm not. He just meant so much to me."

Why was I confessing this to someone I only met a few days ago?

"Don't worry, I get it. I had a girl once, back in New York. She was wonderful, and I thought nothing would separate us. But, things happened. I moved away and we grew apart. It's just life. Sometimes, I wonder if it was all planned like that. Destiny, I mean. Or what if it was planned so that we got a second chance?" he asked.

I stayed silent for a while but smiled. "Is that supposed to make me feel any better?"

"Well, you're smiling so I don't think you're feeling any worse, are you?"

I looked up and laughed. "No, I'm not."

The warning bell rang, announcing the end of lunch. We walked together in silence as he escorted me to my class.

"Maxon?" I asked him when we got there. I looked into his eyes and a surge of deja vu rushed through me.

"Yeah?"

"You know, our families are having dinner together on Saturday."

He smiled. "Yeah, I know."

"You know?"

He nodded.

"Great. So, I guess I'll see you then," I said with a little wave.

He laughed and said, "Yeah, I'll see you then."

 **Hope you enjoyed!**

 **So, I know that was basically a filler chapter, but don't worry. We'll get there.**

 **Review replies:**

 **Guest: Thank you!**

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 **SorryI'mReading: Thank you! And is there an estimated time you'll be done by? No rush, btw, because what you sent me was very good!**

 **Lasting Violet: No, don't worry. TTOOL is still continuing, but it's going to be written by another author. SorryI'mReading is going to be writing the rest of it, so I hope you also enjoy that!**

 **canifindtheone: Thank you! The Aspen thing was one of the main reasons why I had to start over... :P**

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 **Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing. Your reviews make my day! And ahhh there's so many guests (look at the last four in the review replies). So again, thanks bunches and love you guys!**

 **Bye!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Yay, longer chapter today! I'm not finished this whole chapter yet, but I'll update later, I guess.**

 **Btw, just wanted to let you know, I wrote the happiest/cutest/saddest chapter I've ever written and it's given me the feels.**

 **Anyway, tell me what you think!**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: all Selection rights belong to Kiera Cass :)**

"America, honey, did you know that you and Maxon used to go to the same preschool?" mom asked me as we started driving out of the apartment lot in our old, battered car.

I stopped twirling my hair into ringlets and looked at her in the rearview mirror.

"Um, not really," I said, although I could recount that his eyes were very familiar.

I could see dad's lips curl into a smile, deepening his worn laugh lines. "You two were the best of friends," he said as he turned the steering wheel.

I blinked. "Oh, um, he did look familiar," I said.

"So you know him?" mom asked.

"Well, I met him a few days ago, but I don't think I remember him from before. I mean, if you show me some pictures or something, it might be able to spark some memories up," I said.

"Is he good-looking?" May immediately questioned from the other side of the car. I rolled my eyes. My younger sister was now at the age where she fawned over each boy she saw. "I haven't seen you at all in school, so I don't know the new people who you hang out with."

I leaned over Gerad, my little brother squished in the middle of the cramped vehicle, and May leaned in, too.

"You'll have to wait and see," I said.

She gasped and said, "So he _is_ good-looking."

I rolled my eyes before Gerad pushed both of our faces out of the way of his personal bubble.

"Stop talking about guys. You two are disgusting," he said.

"Would you rather we talk about girls? So, is there any girl that you like? Is she really nice to you? Did you kiss her yet?" I asked with a sly grin planted on my face.

"Just be quiet, or I'll put one of my experimental bugs in your bed," he shot back. Gerad the little baby was growing up to become a great scientist, capturing worms and insects to study under his microscope. Not like we could afford much, though. Mom and dad worked hard so that we would be happy, providing Gerad with his scientific research needs, May with her paintbrushes and easels, and me with my keyboard and violin. We all kept our precious items like they were our children, because breaking them would mean many weeks' worth of income.

Before that, though, we also had Kenna and Kota, my older sister and brother, until they moved out. It wasn't easy, giving so little to so many, but our parents, our heroes, managed to let us have what we needed. Their lives were stressful, so, whenever I could, I would book in a concert or two and perform my gigs, scraping in some extra money. That's where I was - at the concert hall - just prior to dinner with the Schreaves at their house. Why we were going to their place instead of a sit-down restaurant, I wasn't sure of. Secretly, I think that mom just wants to see what their house looks like.

I ruffled my brother's brown hair that was almost identical to my dad's and said, "Got it."

He flashed an accomplished smile.

"Woah," May said. I looked over at her and saw her marvel at the views outside the window. I turned my head so I could see out of mine. My jaw opened with a pop as we passed by the immensely large and lavish houses. I never knew such grandeur existed so close to where our shabby apartment was.

"Wow," Gerad said by my ear.

We pulled into a driveway lined with small modern lights and little hedges. It curved into a U-shape, three garage doors at the side. In the centre was a fountain, elegantly spewing water out, sitting in a circle of perfectly trimmed green grass. We parked by the side of the house near the front entrance. As I stepped out of the car, I could see that the dark wooden doors were elegantly fit into the picture of exquisiteness. I suddenly felt out of place wearing just jeans and a plain white t-shirt.

"Come on, now. We're already late," mom said, ushering me forward with an impatient hand. I walked while taking in the beauty of it all. I reached the stone staircase and skimmed my fingers lightly on the railing as I made my way up. Wow.

"Remember to be nice," mom reminded all of us. "And don't forget to smile."

"Got it," I said, pressing the doorbell once. The sound echoed in my ears and we stood there silently before the door swung open.

"Magda! Shalom!" a cheerful voice boomed out. A man with blond hair like Maxon's, who I presumed was his father, greeted us with enthusiasm.

"Clarkson!" my mom beamed, and ran up to the mysterious man, breaking from her formality. She hugged him like she hadn't seen him in forever. Then again, she hadn't.

A woman with auburn hair and tanned skin walked in and gasped.

"Shalom, Magda!" she cried. She embraced dad and they stayed there like that for a long time before she hugged mom.

A long whistle from the staircase caught my attention. Maxon walked down it. That's when I noticed how the exterior of the house was nothing compared to the interior. On the shiny marble floors stood a pair of grand staircases against the perfectly creamy walls. Up above, strings of crystals hung down to create a lavish, modern chandelier.

"Woah," I breathed.

"Wow," May said by my side. I looked at her to see what caught her attention, and I found her ogling over Maxon, who had made it onto the first floor.

"Ames, he is _so_ good-looking," she excitedly whispered into my ear. I rolled my eyes at her being boy-crazy. Soon enough, her attraction for Maxon would wear away as she found something else to be flattered by.

"Hey," he said when he got to us.

"Hi," I replied back.

"Maxon, honey, go show the kids around while we catch up, please," his mom called. She didn't even turn away from my parents to look at us. I sighed. Would I feel like them - in complete joy - when I reunited with Marlee and her family with mine when we were older? Well first, I would have to get a boy who would actually keep me.

"Okay," he replied.

"I'm Maxon, and I'll be your tour guide for today," he joked.

I laughed, May melted, and Gerad smiled.

"Okay, first things first, what are your names?" he asked.

He looked at me. "I'm America," I said, "but you already knew."

He smiled. "That I did, and you?" he asked May.

Her cheeks turned a wild rose red, matching her hair, but she remained brilliantly composed and said, "I'm May."

He nodded. "Nice to meet you. And you?"

"Gerad," my brother said, clearly amazed at the majestic qualities this room possessed, not focused on Maxon.

"Great. Now, let's start," Maxon said. He made his way forward and we followed. "Here is the sitting room."

The open area just beyond the stairs was beautiful. A high ceiling with equally tall windows, two plush couches, a soft carpet, and two large coffee tables.

"And to your right is the kitchen and the dining room."

He guided us down the hallway and we saw what he explained too casually. In his sentence, he drew all the splendor away, but in reality, it was so much more than that. There were two chefs in there preparing our dinner atop the black stove that looked more expensive than my whole room. The black countertops were scattered with food and the silver fridge was being opened.

The cooks made eye contact with us and smiled. I smiled back.

"You have chefs?" I wondered aloud to Maxon.

"They occasionally come," he replied.

"Wow," was all I could say.

He showed us so much more, steering us through the maze of his home. He had an indoor pool, a weight room, a sauna, a bar, and even a movie theatre. It was more than anyone could ever dream of. We stayed in his basement for a while, spending time in the recreation room.

The mounted flat screen TV on the wall played a movie that May and Gerad were watching with interest, but all I could keep my eyes on were the gardens outside. I couldn't see much of them as they were covered by the thin meshing of the curtains, but through the translucency, I could see beautiful hedges and statues.

I heard a pair of footsteps come down the stairs and I finally looked away. Maxon's mom came in through the open door and said, "Dinner's almost ready…"

Her gaze caught on mine and her eyes went wide as she covered her mouth with her hands.

"America?" she gasped.

My siblings looked at us with curiosity. I sat surprised, not knowing what to say. Thankfully, she took over and said, "You've grown up so much. You're so beautiful now."

"Oh, um, thanks?" I said.

"Mom, she obviously doesn't remember who you are," Maxon whisper shouted, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, right." She extended her hand and I shook it, still confused. "I'm Amberly, Maxon's mom. Your parents were very close friends with us. You and Maxon were also very close."

Seeing me there shell-shocked, she said, "Well, it's a pleasure to meet you."

I blinked out of my daze. "And to you, too," I uttered out.

I wasn't completely sure of what happened next, but before I knew it, we were on our way upstairs for dinner. I noticed that I started to walk slower than everyone else. Maxon looked behind him, saw me, and stopped on the stairs.

"You okay?" he asked.

I studied him. His blond hair made me feel nostalgic and his brown eyes made my mind muddled. Flashes of him came to me, but this time, he was younger. Chubbier cheeks, shorter, higher voice.

Distant images of a sandbox came and the smaller versions of us played there.

He said something unintelligible and his mother responded a moment after. I couldn't hear what they were saying. The sounds were all fuzzy.

I held on tight to the rails. My body was starting to go numb from the overwhelming feeling. Maxon rushed down the stairs towards me and escorted me to a nearby chair.

Breathing started to become heavy and difficult; my lungs felt like they were drowned in water. My heart began to beat very quickly. I needed to escape. I needed freedom, air, outside. _Outside_.

"Out..." I gasped.

"What?" I could make out the shapes of his mouth.

"Out...side…" I wheezed.

Blurry spots started to appear at the sides of my vision.

He guided me to the double doors leading to the garden and opened them. I staggered out of his arms and into the sweet Los Angeles air. I stumbled as far as my leaden legs would take me. Eight, nine, ten steps. I collapsed in a heap of a mess at the ground of a stone bench. I threw my arms over it and breathed heavily, feeling my chest press into it. I stared blankly at the glowing sun as my heartbeats started to return to normal and my senses became clearer.

"Are you okay?"

I turned my head and saw Maxon. He bent down to my eye-level.

"No," I croaked out.

"Wanna talk about it?" he asked.

"No," I said. He sighed and got up. I followed him with my eyes as he walked sophisticated circles around the bench.

Something about watching him go round and round relaxed me. "Want to talk about it now?" he asked after a while.

"You'd never understand," I told him.

"Try me."

I exhaled. "Okay. So, one day, this family comes back to town and it turns out the son was one of my best friends, but I don't remember him. Then, I see him in a very distant memory and he suddenly seem more than one of my new friends. It's like there was some huge gap in my life but I didn't know what was supposed to be there. Speaking of which, my boyfriend also left me-

"Would you please stop moving? It's making me dizzy."

He shot me an apologetic glance and sat on the bench. He leaned his elbows on his knees and listened.

"Anyway," I continued, "my boyfriend left me because he said that he wasn't good enough for me. It sucks, you know? It was weeks ago, but I still think about him now. And besides, I'm only seventeen. I'm too young to face all this because it's just so overwhelming."

He was quiet for a moment.

"I get it."

"You do?"

"Yeah. I get what you mean by how it's all so overwhelming. I was really surprised, too, when I found out who you were. But then I remembered more and more about us, and it didn't seem as surprising. It actually made me smile. And about the whole boyfriend thing, I had that, too. Not a boyfriend, obviously," he added quickly.

"I had a girlfriend and when I moved away, we made contact with each other less and less often. Not like I was trying to avoid her, though. It was just that we had new things to focus on, and we kind of drifted apart as a couple. But just this summer, I went back to New York and I saw her again. There wasn't anything awkward about it. We talked like old friends, not like exes.

"It might hurt now, but it will get better. Trust me. And I know everything's confusing, but it will all get sorted out. There might be a bigger cloud ahead, or there might not be, but trust me when I say that there will always be a silver lining."

I smiled and breathed in again. "Does a big cloud mean there will be very good things to come?" I whispered.

He smiled back at me. "I think it does."

I knew that this was only a small cloud looming over me; there will be a larger one up ahead, but I'll brace myself for it because I know that it can lead to a feeling of complete joy.

"Okay. Then I'll be willing to wait for it."

 **Hope you enjoyed!**

 **Review replies (I'm only doing guests and people I can't pm) :**

 **Guest: Thanks! And ya, I'll definitely bring back those scenes. :)**

 **audreyHepburn5502: Thank you! And no, the girl he was talking about was not Kriss. Sometimes, I feel like it's easier to leave some people unnamed, unless... (it's some plot-twisting thing I'm not telling you about. Jks, it's not)**

 **Maxerica15: Thanks and woah! That is quite feisty, lol.**

 **TaylorSwift0769: Thank you so much!**

 **Guest: Thanks!**

 **Bri: Thank you! Your review 10 out of 10 :)**

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 **Were there any specific parts that you liked in this chapter? Please review.**

 **Bye!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys,**

 **I'm sorry I haven't updated, but things got in the way. I should really have an update schedule... (what day would you guys suggest for a weekly one?)**

 **Anywho, this story might have a little OOC or a bit AU with who I paired Maxon up with, but there's a reason behind all that.**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: all Selection rights belong to the one and only Kiera Cass :)**

I sat at the dinner table silently, pushing the food around the plate. I wasn't hungry anyway. I lifted my head for a split second and saw the adults reminiscing their past memories with enthusiasm. Maxon sat beside me engaging in small talk with May and Gerad.

I quickly glanced at everyone around me.

Mrs. Schreave was at the other end of the table. I couldn't remember her from before, but she seemed kind and warm-hearted. Her gaze caught mine and she gave me a light smile. I returned it and looked away.

The same went for Mr. Schreave; he wasn't familiar to me, but he seemed nice. Maybe I had some memories of Maxon's parents that I had to dig up and think long about. Did our families used to be with each other all the time? Did Kenna and Kota, my older sister and brother, remember them?

Then, there was Maxon. He was still talking to my younger siblings, May seeming to have gotten over her fanatic crush over him already, and Gerad listening intently to his stories. From these past few days, I have been able to collect the facts that Maxon is a kind and driven person. But more than that; he was a boy who had recently become something bigger in my life. Not only was he a new friend, but also an old friend. With that forgotten friendship came memories and connections.

I looked at him. He looked at me.

We stared at each other for a few seconds trying to fit the puzzle pieces together before Gerad coughed lightly. Remembering where I was, I blinked a few times and averted my gaze from him, once again returning to moving the food around.

I thought back.

Maxon was around five and the both of us were shovelling through the sandbox to find some treasures. I wasn't exactly sure of what those treasures were, maybe coins, maybe toys. And there was another distant memory of a ring. A handmade ring that I gave to him. But that was all I could remember of him. I hoped to be able to recall more and more memories as time passed.

But wasn't I supposed to remember who my best friend was without any effort? He was obviously important to me before, because I didn't remember anyone else from when I was younger. Did that make me a bad person?

A nudge to my arm startled me back into the present.

"You okay?" Maxon asked.

I nodded out of my faze.

He looked at me suspiciously, but said, "Okay, well, we're going to have dessert soon. There are two options. Strawberry tarts or vanilla cake."

Normally, I would have perked up to the sound of the first, but I really wasn't feeling up to it today.

I shook my head, "I don't really want dessert. Thanks, though."

He knitted his eyebrows together.

"Are you sure you're all right?" he asked.

"More or less."

There was a pause.

"We could go outside if you want," Maxon suggested. "You look a little pale."

"Really?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"Okay, thanks."

I smiled at him and he smiled back.

* * *

The garden was decorated with a scatter of flowers and hedges along the stone path, a few bushes resting happily on the green grass. Its magnificence was augmented by the glowing orange sunset and the chirping melodies of the birds overtop.

We walked in silence along the winding path, me in the front and Maxon keeping at the back.

"Are you feeling better?" he broke through the quietness.

I turned around for a second and continued walking. "Yeah."

I breathed in the salty ocean air and felt another calmness settle in me.

"By the way, it's really nice out here. The garden's beautiful," I added.

I heard him chuckle. "I take it that you didn't see it fully the first time you were here, then."

Thinking back to that embarrassing meltdown, I blushed furiously. "Well, no."

We went onto a wooden bridge that crossed over a small stream, a field of grass and wildflowers on the other side. Sitting comfortably in the middle of that was a grand gazebo, white with brown tiling on its roof.

My fingers skimmed the bridge's black railing, feeling the summer heat come off it. I turned around once again and faced him, starting to walk backwards. Although I squinted from the radiating sunlight, I could see the vastness of the place. I put my other hand to my eyes as if in a salute and took it all in. I could see the bench we were at before, slightly out of the shadow caused by the overhang of the balcony up above. I could see the two majestic stone staircases leading from the living room, I think, down to the front of the basement's entrance of the backyard.

"Careful!" Maxon suddenly shouted. As his warning sounded, I tripped over the little edge from the bridge's connection to the continuation of the path on the other side where the gazebo was. Quick as a flash, he pulled the hand that was loose on the railing and stabilized me so I wouldn't fall.

"Whoops," I meekly said.

He let go of my hand and said, "God, be more careful next time."

I giggled disobediently, "There's no predicting."

He rolled his eyes and asked me, "Are you okay?"

Keeping my smile, I looked down and brushed myself off. "Yeah. Thanks for helping me."

He chuckled and started to walk beside me, hands tucked behind his back in a civilized manner. "I think that's the most times I've ever had to ask that question. 'Are you okay?' I mean, I must have asked you like eight times in what, four days. There should be an award for most amount of times the same question was posed in the everyday life."

"What? No. You've only asked me," I pretended to count aloud, "four times in the past four days."

"That's still more than what the average should be."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, whatever. Anyway, how's school for you?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Switching topics quickly, are you?"

"No," I said. "Anyway, do you like everyone at school so far?"

He sighed with a shake of his head like he lost a battle. "Yeah. They're all really nice...but there's this one guy I'm not so certain about. He makes me kind of...unsettled."

"Oh. Do you know his name?"

We circled around the inside of the gazebo.

"It starts with an A or some other vowel. He's in my history class. Black hair and I think green eyes or something like that."

My breath caught in my throat. Aspen?

For as long as I'd been here walking with Maxon in the gardens, I had forgotten about him. I didn't know what to say, so I timidly asked, "Aspen?"

He looked up in thought. "Yes, I think that's his name."

"He's not bad," I immediately jumped to Aspen's defense. He was sweet, charming, and the most selfless person I know. He gave me up so that I wouldn't have to suffer later on.

Maxon lowered his eyes. "Oh, do you know him?"

"Yeah, he's my b - he's my friend," I switched last moment. It hurt too much to say those words: he was my boyfriend, he is my ex. Besides, I didn't want tension between Maxon and I, because who knew how many more of these dinners we would have together?

He leaned on the railing. "I'm sorry. He's just got a bad vibe on me. I'm not sure what it is, though."

I forced a weak smile. "Let's not talk about him."

There was an awkward pause as we tried to think of something to say. "So...is there anyone who's got your eye?" I finally asked him.

I turned towards the meadowlike field, and then towards him.

"Yeah, there's this one girl. Brown hair."

He stopped at that.

"You just described more than half of the female population at our school."

"Hm, she's really hot."

I made a weird face. "I'm not the hotness consultant."

He laughed and said, "Well, she is. Her name's Celet or something like that. I'm kinda bad with names."

I almost choked on my breath, which seems nearly impossible. "Celeste?" I asked.

He thought for a moment and then pointed his finger at me. "Yeah, that's her name."

I shook my head. "No, no, no. You cannot be with her. I swear she's the devil. Literally."

He looked confused. "What's so bad about her?"

I laughed and tilted my head back. Where to begin? That time in ninth grade when she judged my red hair and let the whole grade think that I dyed my hair to get attention? It wasn't that it was offensive; it was just that the pitiful glances seemed annoyingly never-ending. Or was it the time when she took the credit for all of the hard work Marlee put into a 'group' presentation?

"Everything. If you want to be every girl's arch nemesis at Illea High, be my guest. Just consider someone else," I said.

He raised his eyebrows. "Okay, fine. Um, how about Kriss? Is that her name?"

"Brown hair brown eyes? Yeah. That's Kriss. She's a good choice, caring and smart. I've known her ever since first grade and she's always been really nice."

"She is?" Maxon asked.

I started walking back to the bridge and heard his footsteps fall behind me, indicating that he was coming.

"Yeah."

The steady rush of the water was all we took in for a few moments.

"If you want," I suggested, "I could help you."

I angled slightly towards him so I could see his expression. Puzzled.

"How so?" he asked.

Oh, dear Lord, what am I doing? "I might be able to set you up with her. I'll be your friend, and I could learn her best interests, although I know she really likes math already. You know, I could be your spy."

He looked ready to burst out laughing. "Just because I think someone's cute doesn't mean that I wanna commit to her." I blushed but watched his wide grin slowly turn into something more hopeful. "Actually, I think that's a good idea."

"Hm? Like, setting you up?"

"Yeah. I think I'm actually ready for a relationship," he confessed.

I smiled. "Okay, good. I don't think I'm ready for a relationship, though."

His smile sagged a little. "It's okay. Just give yourself some time, and you'll heal."

"Mr. Know-it-all," I coughed.

"Hey, I don't know everything. I don't know how to cook, that's for sure. Or draw. Or sing. Or speak Spanish fluently. Or count up to twenty in Rus-"

"Okay, okay," I said and held up my hands in surrender. "You don't know everything. But how long did it take for you to get over her?"

"A while. I still think about Daphne sometimes."

"Daphne?"

"Yeah, that's her name. She's wonderful. You should meet her one day. I think you two would get along."

"Okay. I'll keep that in mind."

We continued along the path silently. It was wonderful how Maxon and I had already created a bond in a few short days. I could tell that this was the start of a rekindling of a friendship and I couldn't be any more thankful.

"Maxon?" I asked when we got to the main entrance to the gardens.

"Mm hm?" He turned to face me. The dusky moon beamed off his golden hair and gave off a halo. I laughed because I wasn't sure what I was seeing was real.

"Thank you so much," I said.

He smiled with me, and for the first time, I noticed the dimples at the sides of his mouth.

"No problem."

He reached for the door and pulled it open. "Ladies first," he said.

"Thank you. And by the way, I think I'm ready for dessert. May I please have a strawberry tart?" I asked, eyes wide and pleading.

This time, his smile turned into a laugh. "As you wish, my lady," he teased and nodded his head formally. "As you wish."

 **I hope you guys enjoyed that!**

 **As I said, it _is_ a little OOC, but I hope you don't mind...**

 **Review replies: (btw, if you ever get confused which guest you are, I go in order of who reviewed first)**

 **audreyHepburn5502: Hmm, you found out who the girl was! Are you a bit surprised? Don't worry, I was, too, when I was writing it. :P And thanks for reviewing!**

 **Guest: Aww thanks!**

 **Guest: Thanks! Hope you enjoyed this one!**

 **Maxerica15: Haha lol. Tell Max I say hi. Thanks for reviewing btw!**

 **Guest: Thanks! Hope you enjoyed!**

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 **Thanks everyone for reading my story!**

 **Please review. Bye!**

 **~WishingUnderStars**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys,**

 **I know I haven't updated in a while, but things got in the way :l**

 **And I think you guys were right, I was thinking about it, and I have to change Maxon's ex to Daphne. I was going to make some crazy subplot but I realized it wouldn't work, so I hope you guys don't mind...**

 **Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: all Selection rights belong to the wonderful Kiera Cass**

The final bell of the day rang after an excruciatingly long debate about universal health care. While my classmates were arguing back and forth, however, I had one thing on my mind. Aspen. It was like I could and would never get him out of my head.

As I got swallowed up into the surge of people in the halls, I saw Maxon standing by his classroom door talking to some new friends. When he saw me, he broke apart from the small group and joined my side, a routine we had formed.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey," I returned.

We passed by Celeste standing in front of a locker, as she gave Maxon a flirtatious wave. Thankfully, he did not fall completely under her wicked charm and returned a friendly wave of his own. She looked at me and glowered subtly.

"Whore," she muttered as she walked by me.

I pursed my lips but decided not to do anything about it for Maxon's sake.

"I really don't see anything wrong with Celeste, to be honest. She's really nice," he told me.

"That's because you're a boy. She's an evil genius. Don't tell her I ever said she was a genius, though. I'd never live it down."

He laughed. "Got it. But she's still nice."

I shook my head. "I didn't talk to Kriss yet," I said, switching the topic.

"You really don't need to do it," he told me.

"It's really ok. She's my sort-of friend, you're my friend, it all works out."

He was about to say something, but he looked at his watch and said, "I have to go. Football tryouts."

"What? But it's only been like five minutes since class ended."

"I know, but they start in another five. Plus, I need to get changed." With a small sorry smile, he ran off the way we just came.

I wasn't all alone, though, because an exhausted Marlee came over. She looked worn, her feet trudging and her shoulders sagging.

"Hey. I just had the worst day ever. I don't even know why I chose calculus! It's barely been a week and I already have no idea what I'm doing. Anyway, did you hear the announcements today?" she asked.

"My condolences to you and no," I said.

"Oh, well they're looking for some people to help out backstage with the winter concert. I was thinking you might want to sign up for the musical aspect of it. Plus, you get volunteer hours."

"I go every single year. Are you going?" I asked her. We were so tight-knit that we did nearly everything together. I knew her deepest, darkest secrets, like how she, and not Gabe the troublemaker, was the one who accidentally let the class pet out in fourth grade, and she knew mine.

"Probably, but I'm due for an appointment with my guidance counselor soon. It's just for a scheduling thing, no biggie. The sign-up sheet is outside the theatre. I'll come as soon as possible," she said, and for the second time in a few minutes, I was left alone.

* * *

I lingered for a bit inside one of the side stairwells and waited for the school to clear. Outside the theatre's double doors, there were sheets of paper stapled onto the bulletin board. Lighting, audio, visual (pictures, slideshows, etc.), props, were the four headings under the backstage. Every year, Illea High came up with an extraordinary production, and it was a great accomplishment if someone got to be in the cast or crew.

Never one to be in the spotlight, the head music teacher always ensured that I would be in the back as the lead project manager for music, even when I was a freshman. She always said that I would be one of Juilliard's finest. So, it was no doubt I picked up the pen and scrawled my name under the column. _America Singer._

That was that. I just signed myself up for two months worth of work, imagining combining audio clips and listening to the same soundtrack over and over until I would feel nauseous.

"Mer?"

The voice I had dreaded yet hoped for called my nickname, and he was the only one who called me that. A flow of sweet summertime memories came to me. My heart tightened and my gut wrenched.

I turned around and there he was. Real, perfect, but not mine.

"Hi," I meekly said. "I'll just move out of the way."

I was about to go, but he asked, "Mer, can you please stay?"

"Aspen, please. I don't really want to talk right now," I told him, fiddling with my fingers.

"It's just really quick," he begged.

I looked up and down the deserted hall, then caved. "Fine."

He looked me in the eyes and I felt myself breaking on the inside. He was supposed to be mine, my one true sweetheart. What happened?

"Look," he started. "I know you're probably still mad at me, but I want to tell you that I'm really sorry. You have no idea how much I mean it. I'm hoping that one day you'll understand why I did all that, but for now, I just need you to know that I am really sorry."

His eyes spoke it, round and innocent. I could feel tears biting at my own.

"Aspen, it wasn't supposed to end that way. I wish there could have been a less painful way, but what's done is done. Yeah, it hurts, but I just don't want anything awkward between us. We were such good friends back then. I hope we can be closer...less distant is what I mean." I looked up and laughed humorlessly. "God, I knew that I might have been sacrificing our friendship the moment we kissed, but I took the risk anyway."

He scratched the back of his head and said, "Yeah, I guess we were walking into that."

He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and blew out a breath. "So, I guess we'll be spending quite some time together."

The tears had resided, at least for the time being. "Hm?" I asked.

"Oh, um, I'm going to sign up for the lighting crew. Basically a guaranteed spot. We have to work a lot together, remember?"

"Oh, right. Yeah," I mumbled.

I stepped aside and watched him put his name there.  
"So, I guess I'll see you around?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Yeah, see you," I returned. I saw a flicker of a smile turn up before he left, his footsteps echoing down the empty hall.

I faced the sheets of paper and drew in a breath. Our names were side-by-side, only separated by a border of ink. Aspen Leger and America Singer. I always thought we would have our happily ever after, but things took for a turn. Life isn't perfect, but now, I realized it doesn't always have to be. We can mend the broken hearts, sew the seams back together, and love like we could never imagine.

 **Hope you enjoyed what I had for you!**

 **Did you like the part with Aspen? Yay or nay?**

 **Review replies**

 **Guest: Well, he's a teenage boy, and I've heard sooooo many guys say to girls what Maxon said to America. Anyway, hope you liked.**

 **chescaanne: Hope you enjoyed!**

 **Lasting Violet: Hmm, you'll see what I have planned.**

 **Guest: Thank you soooo much!**

 **OneMoreChapter: Oh, no. It's because America's one of the closer friends that he's made so far, so he's trusting her word. Anyway, hope you saw what I meant. Sorry, too tired rn, so things are getting too jumbled up...**

 **Maxerica15: Aww, thanks for having faith in me, but I hope I fixed it.**

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 **Thank you everyone!**

 **I'm really supposed to be sleeping right now (it's 3:45 am :P ) but I haven't given you guys anything for a long time.**

 **Anyway, please review.**

 **Bye until next time!**

 **~WishingUnderStars**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi guys!**

 **I'm sorry I haven't updated in soo long. I had things to do, I kind of forgot (but not really) what happened in the actual series, and then I forgot where I was in the story so it was all too confusing. :p**

 **I'm also sorry that this is a shorter chapter... :l**

 **But, THE CROWN HAS COME OUT! (they don't have it at my local bookstore yet :( ) I haven't read it yet and I know there are a lot others who haven't as well, so pls don't post any spoilers in your stories or reviews (at least for the time being).**

 **Anyway, hope you enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: all Selection rights belong to Kiera Cass**

I threw my headphones down in frustration, almost breaking the laptop in the process.

"Whoops," I muttered, checking it for damage that wasn't there. For three hours now, I have been trying to compile the new soundtrack for the play, but I was getting nowhere. There were only two tracks that I managed to complete, and those were to accommodate the most leisurely scenes.

My stomach growled.

It was nearly dinnertime and I was home alone, so there would be no cooked food. I certainly wouldn't do it.

I swiveled my chair around, away from the window's view of Los Angeles, and walked to the kitchen. I grabbed some cereal, poured some milk, and sat back down to resume my work when I received a call.

"Hello?" I answered.

"America, you have to help me."

"Marlee, are you okay? Do you need me to come over?"

She laughed then groaned. "Maybe. My brain is literally melting. I can feel it deteriorating, and it's so uncomfortable. Please, please, please save me."

I rolled my eyes at her dramatization. "What did you do this time?"

"It's not me, it's school. I'm not going to survive this year." She started to fake a sob.

"Hun, you're going to live, because if you don't, I'm going to be lonely. Now, what did you call me for?" I took a bite of my food.

"What are you eating?" she asked.

"Cereal."

"What type?"

"Why does it matter?" I questioned her, yet eating another spoonful.

"Because if you have the one with the granola clusters, I'm going to come over and steal some. But if it has the dried strawberries or anything like that, I'm going to vo-"

"Marlee. Is there something you needed?" I pressed.

"Oh yeah, there is. You know how I got cast as Daniella, right?"

"Mm hm."

"Well, for the line where she says, 'I will never forget the smile you held the sun with', do I say it as, 'I will never forget the smile you held the sun with', or do I say, 'I will never forget the smile you held the sun with'?"

"The first one, but why?" I inquired. "It's only been a few days since you've gotten your script."

She sighed heavily, like she was exhausted beyond belief. "Miss wants our first act memorized by next week. She's insane."

Although she couldn't see, I raised my eyebrows. "Mar, Miss is the best. She probably has a reason for it."

I could feel her glowering at me through the other end of the line. "That's because you've never had her be your director. Anyway, I wanted to ask because I need to know how you're doing the music for that scene."

I searched around on my desk and found the playbook. "Which scene is it?"

"Act one, scene two."

I flipped there and looked at my laptop, scrolling to see if I have a sequence ready. "Sorry, I don't have it yet."

"Ugh, okay. I need to know whether the whole scene will be somber or mellow, and it kind of all depends on that one line. It honestly makes all the difference," she explained.

"Sorry, but I still don't have it. Maybe check back with me the day after tomorrow for it."

"I have to wait two whole days? Fine," she joked.

I ate some more of the cereal and hoped it hadn't sogged up yet.

"Okay, now that that's done and over with, guess what happened?" she asked.

"I don't know, what?"

"No, guess."

"Um, you're going to Canada for vacation?" I blurted out, the first thing that was on my mind.

"What? I wish, but no. Apparently, Celeste tried to ask Maxon out for like coffee or whatever, and he rejected her. Well, no. He just said he was busy and he had to take a rain check on it. Isn't that so weird? She's probably never gotten turned down before," Marlee said without taking a breath. After she finished, she gasped for air and I laughed.

"My dear, he called me right after it happened. He told me that he wasn't sure what to do, so he told her that. He was so frantic it was so funny."

"Oh," she finally exhaled.

"Yeah, so I told him that he woul-"

"Marlee, it's time for dinner," a muffled voice spoke on the other side. "Okay, mom. Just need to finish really quickly," Marlee replied.

"Sorry for that," she said. "Continue."

"Okay, yeah, so I told him that he would be better off with anyone else other than Celeste."

"And?"

"Well, it reminded me that I have to talk to Kriss, and I've been holding it off for so long. I don't know why, though," I told her. "Anyway, that's the end of my story."

"Aw, I thought there was more. Oh well, I'll talk to you later, I guess."

"Yeah, talk to you later."

 **Hope you enjoyed!**

 **As I said, it was a fairly short chapter, so I'm sorry.**

 **Hopefully, I'll be able to update soon. I'll try to.**

 **Have a good day! Bye!**


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